Today, dear readers, we announce a competition on Stirring Trouble for the best humorous comment on any of the articles that we post on our website. In no more than 500 words, please. In fact, the fewer words, the better. For as it was once said in a great Russian classic, conciseness is the younger sister of talent.
Every week we’ll be selecting the best comment and posting it on our website. The winner will get £250 and a letter of praise from the Editor. Two runners up will get £100 each, but no letter of praise, because they should have tried harder. But they will see their comments posted on our website, enabling them to claim that they have been published in a leading media outlet.
For our readers living in Mongolia, the prize money would arrive by special courier, as we have heard that no post reaches the country. Just as no post reaches parts of Russia, China, India and, of course, Britain, where the Royal Mail has been undermined by Labour to such an extent that it cannot function properly any more. So the best we can do is send to our readers in those four booming economies photos of five £50 notes, by email. They can print them out and show them as proof that they have won a competition on Stirring Trouble.
Readers in Zimbabwe will get their cash prizes delivered in large trucks, as the rate of the local currency is such that £250 would amount to something like a trillion. By the way, Zimbabwe should be congratulated or managing to create more billionaires that any other nation on the planet. Apart, that is, from the planet where Russian President Dmitry Medvedev resides, a man who seems to think that all Russians live in prosperity and are deeply happy with the way things are going. And apart from the planet where the leadership of the Chinese Communist Party waxes confident that most Chinese people are basking in luxury. And, of course, apart from the planet where Prime Minister Gordon Brown lives, a man who thinks that he can fool everyone in Britain that things are fast improving and thus win the next General Election.
But seriously: send your comments on the articles you like best. And wait for that cheque in the post. If you have a postal service in your area, that is.