More Breaking News Items. From The Stirring Trouble Team

November 29, 2009

More Breaking News Items. From The Stirring Trouble Team

We present more breaking news items. From the Stirring Trouble team. Breaking News: Scandal erupts as it emerges that Barack Obama and his wife Michelle have gatecrashed the US presidency. Breaking News: Al-Qaeda says it has been gatecrashing official functions at the White House since time immemorial. What’s the big deal, spokesman says. Even a child can do it. Breaking News: After the gatecrashing scandal White House admits that President Obama often mingles with people who should not be there in the first place. Breaking News: International Federation of Gatecrashers hails two of its members for fooling the security at the White House by disguising themselves as a man and woman. Breaking News: Living sports legend Tiger Woods admits his dream of becoming a racing driver has not worked... 

Catch 22: When Judges Side With Bankers

November 28, 2009

Catch 22: When Judges Side With Bankers

Thomas Mathew writes: Pardon me for asking, but do you think the members of Britain’s Supreme Court knew that what they were doing was wrong when they ruled, unanimously, this week in favour of the banks imposing extortionate charges on people who have current accounts with them? Hmm, that’s a tough one, eh? A catch 22 situation. Especially considering that all the previous courts in this case ruled in favour of the Office of Fair Trading (OFT) that represented the interests of millions customers who were trying to get their money back from the banks. So that you know, the Supreme Court has ruled that the OFT had no legal right to question the banks’ levies, which was the same as taking the side of the money men. It’s good to be in banking in Britain. You win under... 

More Breaking News Items. From The Stirring Trouble Team

November 27, 2009

More Breaking News Items. From The Stirring Trouble Team

We present more breaking news items. From the Stirring Trouble team.Breaking News: President Barack Obama announces that he is going to be present at the Copenhagen climate summit. If Al Gore has made a fortune out of climate change I’d be foolish to miss my chance, he says. Breaking News: White House says that the US is ready to give any promise on cutting CO2 emissions as long as the deadline for it comes after President Obama’s second term. Breaking News: President Obama reveals that if he loses the next election he will pardon as many dodgy people as possible and become fabulously rich, just like Bill Clinton did. Breaking News: Newly uncovered documents reveal that President John Kennedy had committed suicide. Breaking News: Chinese communist leaders say they all dye their... 

More Adventures Of Superbanker Mervyn. And His Friends The Moneymen

November 26, 2009

More Adventures Of Superbanker Mervyn. And His Friends The Moneymen

Adam Lovejoy writes: Pardon me for asking, but are you a fan of that great man, the Governor of the Bank of England, Mervyn King? He is able to keep inflation under control all by himself and transform a crippling recession into a recovery with just one statement. He can make tens of billions of pound sterling disappear and then reappear again, as if by magic. And with one word he can flood the markets with billions of new crispy banknotes and see to it that it has no bad side effects for the economy. Anything Superbanked Mervyn says, goes and no one dares to contradict him or point out that his figures and his predictions don’t make sense. The most recent feat that Mervyn pulled off was to make over 60 billion smackers disappear in the safes of the moneymen at two rogue banks without... 

More Breaking News Items. From The Stirring Trouble Team

November 24, 2009

More Breaking News Items. From The Stirring Trouble Team

We present more breaking news items. From the Stirring Trouble team. Breaking News: The newly appointed President of Europe, Herman van Rompuy, reveals that he is a sucker for a left-wing orgy with right-wing undertone. I’m all things to all people, he says.Breaking News: European Union’s new foreign policy chief, Baroness Ashton, warns people not to mistake her for a blonde bimbo. I might be cute and sexy but I’m hard as nails, she says. Breaking News: Chancellor Angela Merkel says now that she’s got two wimps to represent the EU her dream of Germany’s world domination moved a step closer. Breaking News: President of the European Commission Manuel Barosso admits that several of his ancestors were vampires. Breaking News: Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi... 

Why Is Mao Zedong Making A Comeback In China?

November 24, 2009

Why Is Mao Zedong Making A Comeback In China?

Martin McCauley writes: When the father of Chinese perestroika, the late Deng Xiaoping, had won the struggle to succeed the late communist leader, Mao Zedong, in 1978 he ordered the removal of statues and mementos of the Mao period. Deng wanted to demonstrate that the era of dead pan communism was over. Policy was supposed to be decided not by the whims of the leadership but on the basis of hard facts and figures. Mao was probably turning in his grave in those days.But now it is time for Deng to start doing the same: Mao’s legacy is enjoying the great revival and statues to the Great Helmsman are once again being erected in China. Why is this? In cities and provinces which President Obama or other foreign dignitaries do not visit, the symbols of the Cultural Revolution (1966-76) are beginning... 

A Quick Cynical Glance At Events Around The World. In No Particular Order

November 23, 2009

A Quick Cynical Glance At Events Around The World. In No Particular Order

Dan Majestic and Adam Lovejoy write: Few people are holding their breath as the long awaited Chilcot inquiry into the war in Iraq opens this week in Britain. To expect that it would give answers to any of the serious questions about Britain’s involvement in the illegal war would be too much to ask, considering that the current Labour government would be the last to want to get to the bottom of things. Not to mention that Sir John Chilcot, presiding, served on the 2004 Lord Butler inquiry that had failed to find anything unusual in the then Prime Minister Tony Blair’s closest advisors ‘sexing up’ the documents that were later used to convinced the nation to go to war. Still, word is that Mr Blair has been losing sleep recently, having missed out on a chance to get that so... 

What’s All The Fuss With Thierry Henry’s Handball? All Footballers Cheat

November 23, 2009

What’s All The Fuss With Thierry Henry’s Handball? All Footballers Cheat

R.F.Wilson writes: Pardon me for not joining the indignation brigade that has been busy screaming their heads off, demanding a replay of that supposedly ‘fateful’ World Cup qualifying match between France and Irealnd because Theirry Henry had helped to score the decisive goal in injury time with a skilful hand gesture. And let me also discard the preposterous suggestion that the disputed goal supposedly put the integrity of the beautiful game into doubt. I will start with this: what exactly do they find beautiful in the game? The beauty has all but gone a long time ago, especially from the international matches. National teams now consist of overpaid players, who have multi-million contract obligations with their clubs and sponsors that overshadow any other commitments. Let me... 

A Passionate Stance On Women’s Shoes

November 23, 2009

A Passionate Stance On Women’s Shoes

Gren-Hilda Duval de Villeneuve writes: Today, I’m going to tackle a profoundly important and complex subject, that of women’s shoes and the range of conflicting feelings this issue inspires in me. Men’s footwear will have to take a back seat here, as it does not even register a blip on the radar when compared to the abundance, and really quite decadent variety, of women’s shoes.Adam Lovejoy has already expressed his views on this subject (read his piece, Give Women Proper Shoes. Now! posted most recently on 02.11.09. in the Angry Rants section) and while his ideas make complete objective sense – that there are not that many good shoes on offer – subjectively most women might reject them. The reason is women have a complex and almost completely irrational... 

China Springs A Surprise: A New Generation Jet Fighter

November 22, 2009

China Springs A Surprise: A New Generation Jet Fighter

Martin McCauley writes: There has long been speculation that the Chinese Air Force has been developing fifth generation fighters. The aim is to have them in service within eight or ten years and certainly by 2020. Recently, the deputy commander of the Air Force confirmed these rumours. Flight trials will begin soon. These revelations came as a shock to Western analysts who have been taken aback by the speed of this modernisation. It also reveals that the Chinese defence industry is becoming increasingly sophisticated and making it possible for China to alter the strategic balance in Asia. The Chinese regard superiority in the air as a major factor contributing to dominance on the ground and the oceans. The fifth generation fighters will have 4S capabilities: stealth, super cruise, super manoeuvrability... 

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