Adam Lovejoy writes: Millions of football fans across England are trying to come to terms with the revelation that their idol, Chelsea and national squad captain, John Terry, has been shagging a lingerie model behind his wife’s back. What they find even harder to stomach is that the bird in question was the then ex-WAG of Terry’s former Chelsea mate and drinking buddy, Wayne Bridge.‘It’s heart breaking, innit,’ was the response of several thousand Chelsea fans, as they gathered at [...]

Martin McCauley writes: Is there a coup in the making in China? The situation at the top is getting pretty heated, with two groups positioning against each other. It’s like a boxing match, of sorts… In the blue corner of the ring is that master of knockouts, President of China, Hu Jintao, and his preferred followers from the Chinese Communist Youth League (CYL). In the red corner is Vice-President Xi Jinping, the President in waiting, and the sons of former [...]

Thomas Mathew writers: Pardon me for asking, but was Tony Blair taking the piss while giving evidence to the Chilcot inquiry into the war in Iraq on Friday or was he serious? Less than 48 hours have passed since Mr Blair appeared in front of Sir John Chilcot and other members of the committee, yet hard questions are being asked already. Was Tony pulling a fast one when he said that his past insistence that Iraq could deploy its weapons [...]

R.F.Wilson writes: It all comes down to one thing when you have a big international gathering: whether booze is served at it in abundance. If it flows like the Mississippi, or the Nile, then things tend to go smoothly and no hasty decisions are made. Quite often no decisions are taken at all, which is usually the best outcome possible. But if the booze is limited or, as it happened at the London conference on Afghanistan, is not served at [...]

Thomas Mathew writes: Well, there you have it: Tony Blair has appeared in front of the Chilcot inquiry into the war in Iraq, saying that he has no regrets about lying to the nation and sending British troops to take out Saddam Hussein. That is how he is, Tone. He is convinced that he did everyone a huge favour and will be remembered as a hero and a straightforward sort of guy. No one really expected Blair to repent or [...]

We present another selection of breaking news items. From the Stirring Trouble team.Breaking News: President Barack Obama announces in his State of the Union address that he will make many more promises this year that he does not intend to keep. Breaking News: White House says President Obama will be stating the blindingly obvious throughout most of 2010. Breaking News: Confusion grows as it emerges that more than 50 per cent of the Obama Administration consists of officials who served [...]

Adam Lovejoy writes: The British people are rejoicing. The news that the economy has dipped upwards by 0.1 per cent in the last quarter of 2009 sparked mass celebrations in towns and cities across the land, with people hugging and tongue kissing total strangers. No more suffering, no more penny pinching, no more house repossessions, no more uncertainty. The good times are back again.In London jubilation spilled out of offices and private accommodations on the streets yesterday with people hardly [...]

Dan Majestic writes: Pardon me for asking, but who the hell cares that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have split up? Does it make any difference to anyone whether they live together or not? Does it really matter that they haven’t had sex for a year because of Brad’s premature ejaculation, or whatever else his problem was? I for one don’t give a toss what they’re up to in their so-called private life, that has been so public all these [...]

We present another selection of breaking news items. From the Stirring Trouble team. Breaking News: President Barack Obama will announce in his State of the Union address that he’s been nominated for the Nobel Prize in Literature for 2010. Breaking News: White House denies reports that most of the aid sent to Haiti has up to now been used to accommodate American troops there. Breaking News: Obama Administration reveals that it is treating the new Senator from Massachusetts, Scott Brown, [...]

R.F.Wilson writes from Brussels: In line with its policy of fostering closer links between the peoples of Europe, the European Commission, headed by that fine specimen of a man, President Jose Manuel Barroso, has proposed the introduction of a Common European Language (CEL) and a Common European Appearance (CEA) that would help smooth the differences between nations and create a federal superstate at the earliest convenience. At a recent meeting of the EC the commissioners approved the draft proposal, presented [...]