Anton Goryunov writes: It’s this time again, people, when we look back on the past year that is arriving any moment now and think what lessons we have learnt from it. And I suppose that the biggest one of them all is that s..t happens and, even more importantly, will continue to happen next year. A lot. The other thing we’ve learnt in 2010 is that money men rule the world and are allowed to get away with anything by [...]

We present more pearls of wisdom and witty observations from the Stirring Trouble team. Women, if you fantasise a lot about having sex with Hollywood stars you need to remember that many of them have STDs. I suppose corruption is the glue that holds any government together. Until the bastards fall out and it collapses. If you’re a total prick, you will succeed in this life. Not in the next one, though. Once upon a time there was a boy [...]

Alex Nekrassov writes from London: Imagine you’re a Russian oligarch and you’ve invested a billion of your hard earned money – I’m joking here, in case you’ve fallen for that ‘hard earned’ stuff – into an English football club, expecting it to win you all the major trophies in the world. But after 7 years you’re still missing out on the big European Championship title, not to mention winning the home league only 3 times out of the possible 7. [...]

Dan Majestic and Ben Delicious write: To Washington and Kabul first, where it transpired that the multi-billion flow of weapons, hardware and supplies to the US troops in Afghanistan has been mired in bribery, double-dealings and even illegal sale of arms to the insurgents. Yes, ladies and gents, what was intended as a showpiece operation to help impose democracy on the reluctant Afghans appears to have had all the markings of a dodgy wheeler-dealer set up, with US army procurement [...]

Anton Goryunov writes from Pristina: I don’t know about you, but I’d love to go to Kosovo. As a tourist, for a couple of crazy fun-filled days. Or maybe to buy some human organs that I might need later in life. I hear it’s the best place to get a decently prized liver or kidney. But seriously, where in Europe would you find a country that is only two and half years old? In fact, I dare you to find a country [...]

We present more pearls of wisdom and witty observations from the Stirring Trouble team. One of the lessons of 2010: buying useless Chinese made junk is still number 1 hobby for millions. Why not adopt a Guantanamo inmate this festive season and see him win a huge compensation in the courts. Having few friends is a sign of intelligence. Want to bring on WW3? Invest in China, the country behind the next world war. Politics and prostitution have much in [...]

Ben Delicious writes from London: As a bunch of lowlifes launch a campaign to immortalise their idol, Tony Blair, in a statue in parliament we ask: how about a creative approach to reflect what the great man stood for? The first thing that comes to mind when thinking of Tony Blair is money. He was in it for the money from the start, so why not reflect it in his statue, depicting him counting cash, accepting wades of cash or even sniffing cash. [...]

Anton Goryunov writes from Honolulu: First the big news: President Barack Obama, who is spending his Christmas holidays in Hawaii, has strongly condemned the latest terrorist attack in Pakistan, when a woman suicide bomber blew herself up at a UN food distribution point in the city of Khar in Bajawar province, killing 45 people at the latest count and injuring dozens of others. Mr Obama made his strong feelings known in a statement released by the White House, so that [...]

Today we present a new selection of spoof breaking news items. Compiled by the Stirring Trouble team. Breaking News: Secret world government would like to wish a Happy New Year to all politicians who did as they were told in 2010. Breaking News: In its New Year message to the infidels Al-Qaeda reveals that a lot of its attacks are conducted purely for self-promotional reasons. Breaking News: Newly re-elected Belarus dictator Aleksandr Lukashenko admits that watching police beat up demonstrators [...]

Adam Lovejoy writes from London: I’m really disappointed with the Windsors. Take the Queen, for example. Yes, I know, I know, a lot of people think that she’s a great monarch. And that in itself, by the way, is very suspicious, because even staunch republicans think she’s wonderful. Now why would that be? Why would people, who detest the very idea of having a hereditary head of state, love the Queen to bits? Well let me tell you why: though [...]