Can A Man And A Woman Be Just Friends? Not Until They’ve Had Sex At Least Once

January 17, 2011

Ben Delicious writes from London: For all of you out there who are always saying that they would want to know who was behind President John Kennedy’s assassination here is the answer: it was the mob, OK? The mobsters helped him win the election but then felt that he didn’t live up to their expectations. It’s that simple. Now get over it.

With that out of the way let’s now deal with that eternal question: can a man and a woman be just friends, if they are not impotent and frigid that is? The answer is: no, they can’t. Technically a woman can last as a friend with a man for a while, but there’s no chance that a man would not start thinking of getting his female friend into bed, one way or another, pretty soon in the friendship. I don’t buy all that rubbish about man/woman friendships. As long as they have differently structured private parts, with one possessing a pair of breasts on top of other differences, it’ll always going to be on the edge, with both sides feeling rather awkward carrying on without some sexual intercourse involved. That’s how it was meant to be in the big master plan of creation. Men and women were created not just physically and mentally different, but sexual intercourse was thrown in to get them interested in each other and not pleasure themselves with wild beasts or other creatures.

The thing is, that contrary to what they say, women do get upset when men don’t show any feelings towards them. They like to be appreciated and sought after, if I can use this phrase in this case. And men feel the pressure as well, thinking that women would get upset if they show no desire to shag them silly. So all that talk about mutual respect, in non-sexual way, between a man and a woman is pure bollocks. Feminists like to talk about it a lot, but feminists have no idea about real life and live on some planet where stupidity is obligatory.

But it’s a totally different thing if a man and a woman have had their fun and then stay on friendly terms. Yep, it’s a different set up altogether. Although it’s not widespread, it still happens. With lust out of the way, a man and a woman can treat each other as friends and even discuss sex with others and share tips about relationships generally. Both sides feel no pressure anymore and can be open and sincere with each other. They stop lying and pretending and say it like it is. Their privates are no longer receiving any signals from the brain and are used for passing water only.

In certain cases men and women can be so revolting that any idea of sexual intercourse between them would send shudders down their spines and other places. But can revolting people stay friends for a long period of time? I doubt it. So it doesn’t really interfere with my line of thinking.

Another dimension to this issue is whether women can be friends with gay men. The accepted thinking in this case is that gay men make great girlfriends for women, but I doubt it personally because women feel the pressure of knowing that this guy would never be interested in them as women, so the friendship is bound to fade away quite quickly.

Before I leave you to ponder on this and many other issues I just want to remind you that reading sex manuals and watching all those DVDs with advice on how to improve your sex life would not help you in the slightest and may even turn you off sex for good. And another thing, this time for men only: once you get hooked on Viagra, you risk becoming totally impotent in about 5 to 6 years.

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