More Breaking News Items. From The Boys At Stirring Trouble

January 25, 2012

More Breaking News Items. From The Boys At Stirring Trouble

We present another portion of spoof breaking news items compiled by the boys at Stirring Trouble: Breaking News: The EU announces that the euro will be measured in weight to pay for basic goods. We still have full confidence in our currency, spokesman in Brussels confirms. Breaking News: Greek government reveals the list of most outrageous tax evaders that includes all of its members of parliament and most cabinet ministers. Breaking News: German Chancellor Angela Merkel says it would be cheaper for Germany to bomb the shit out of the rest of the Eurozone rather than pay off its debts.   Breaking News: In an interview to a glossy magazine President Nicolas Sarkozy accepts that financial considerations are the main reason for him seeking re-election.   Breaking News: President of the... 

More Breaking News. From The Stirring Trouble Team

January 22, 2012

More Breaking News. From The Stirring Trouble Team

We present more breaking news spoof items. From the Stirring Trouble team. Breaking News: White House reveals that President Barack Obama is feeling financially secure for the first time during his presidency. Breaking News: Republican presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich admits that he has always lived in an open marriage with politics. Breaking News: Secretary of State Hillary Clinton says she has absolutely no idea where she will travel next and why. They try to surprise me, she explains. Breaking News: Pentagon reveals it would love to start a war in Latin America or Africa. Out of spite, like it happened in Iraq and Afghanistan. Breaking News: President Hamid Karzai admits that the thought of NATO pulling out of Afghanistan in 2014 did influence his travel arrangements for that year. I will... 

Is Iran Heading For War With the United States?

January 14, 2012

Is Iran Heading For War With the United States?

Martin McCauley writes from Tehran: President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is on a love in in Central and South America. First he went to Caracas to have a schmooze with that Marxist American hater, Hugo Cháves. Fine words were exchanged but not even the loquacious Cháves would lend support to Iran in its fight with the US. Why not? America buys most of Venezuela’s oil. President Obama has Cháves where he wants him: under his foot. Another point. Venezuela is an oil exporting country and has no need of Iranian oil. Ahmadinejad is making for Cuba to have a pow wow with Raul Castro and his doddering brother, Fidel. Can Cuba put a spoke in America’s wheel? Hardly. Cuba is almost broke and cannot afford to give the ayatollahs much help. Then the Iranian President makes for Nicaragua and Ecuador –... 

More Spoof Breaking News. From The Team At Stirring Trouble

January 7, 2012

More Spoof Breaking News. From The Team At Stirring Trouble

Today we present more spoof breaking news items from the team at Stirring Trouble. Breaking News: President Barack Obama denies that raising $1 billion to finance his election campaign proves that he’s not certain of his victory in November. I just need the money, he explains. Breaking News: Republican presidential hopeful Mitt Romney says his religion allows him to say as many untruths as he wants. It’s a fine religion, he says. Breaking news: Hillary Clinton told by her aides that uncrossing her legs suggestively while she’s sitting makes no difference as she wears trousers all the time. Breaking News: Bill Clinton confesses that he was never in politics for money. It was pure ambition, he says. And the sex outside marriage naturally. Breaking News: Mexico’s government says it’s... 

More Spoof Breaking News Items. From The Boys At Stirring Trouble

January 1, 2012

More Spoof Breaking News Items. From The Boys At Stirring Trouble

Today we present more spoof breaking news items from the team at Stirring Trouble. Breaking News: Pentagon officials say they’re spoilt for choice in choosing where to start a new war in 2012. It can be Iran, Syria or North Korea, they say. Or we can be original and hit Mexico or Cuba. Breaking News: Vice President Joe Biden admits it’s spooky to be ‘just one heartbeat away from the presidency’. Sometimes I get crazy ideas, he reveals in an interview to a children’s magazine. Breaking News: Secretary of State Hillary Clinton admits she flirts on twitter. Breaking News: Fears grow that the US Federal Reserve has printed too many new dollars as more and more people use them to light up their barbeques. Breaking News: American Right says it’s ready to swap places with the Left... 

More Spoof Breaking News Items. From The Stirring Trouble Team

December 27, 2011

More Spoof Breaking News Items. From The Stirring Trouble Team

Today we present another fine selection of spoof breaking news items. From the Stirring Trouble team. Breaking News: President Barack Obama finally confesses to being a Muslim. But in a non-religious sort of way. Breaking News: Asked whether the thoughts of the American people are with the Iraqis, now that the country is sliding into civil war, White House spokesman says: ‘Yeah, sure. And we also pray for the Syrians every f..king day.’ Breaking News: The Duke of Edinburgh’s spokesman denies that he spent Christmas in hospital after attempting a penis enlargement all by himself. The Duke hasn’t been using his instrument in an aggressive way for the past 20 years, spokesman explains. Breaking News: President Nicolas Sarkozy reveals that he has not made one wrong move since joining the... 

Breaking News? It’s News But Not Really

December 2, 2011

Breaking News? It’s News But Not Really

Adam Lovejoy writes from London: All you people who get all excited at seeing or hearing the words ‘breaking news’: you’re just being coned into believing that it’s actually proper news. It’s not. It’s a cheap stunt, a gimmick, a way to cut corners by simply reading out the stuff from the press agency wires that exist to alert hacks to what’s going on in the world, so that they can write their reports or do their broadcasts. At least that is how it was for 50 odd years, until some weasel TV and radio execs figured that breaking news was a cheap way of spicing up the information flow, duping people into thinking that it breaks all the bloody time, even if it’s not really news. And the beauty of it all is that it gets people hooked on the idea that they are actually being... 

Spoof Breaking News Items. From The Boys At Stirring Trouble

August 20, 2011

Spoof Breaking News Items. From The Boys At Stirring Trouble

We present a new selection of breaking news items. From the Stirring Trouble team. Breaking News: US President Barack Obama insists he would be a great leader during his second terms. I finally got the hang of things, he says. Plus, I know my way round the White House and it’s a big house. Breaking News: US Vice President, Joe Biden, reveals that he looks so young and vibrant because he never really had a proper job in his life. Breaking News: White House declares victory over the Taliban in Afghanistan. Not everyone may have noticed, spokesman says, but we’re on top of things there. Breaking News: The US Federal Reserve announces an international competition for the best forged 500 euro bill. We really need some new blood in our system, the Fed says. Breaking News: Iraqi government... 

More Breaking News. From The Team At Stirring Trouble

June 10, 2011

More Breaking News. From The Team At Stirring Trouble

We present more spoof breaking news items. From the boys at Stirring Trouble. Breaking News: Asked if they enjoy bombing the s..t out of Libya NATO commanders admit that they kind of like the idea that they are getting away with it because it’s UN authorised. Breaking News: Saudi King Abdulla overheard saying: Arab f..king spring. Who the f..k needs a spring like that? Breaking News: President Obama denies rumours that he has neutered his dog. He’s as frisky as ever, he says. Just like Anthony Weiner. Breaking News: Vice President Joe Biden says he was always convinced that ‘taking the piss’ meant taking a urine sample to the doctor. Breaking News: White House says President Obama treats the conflict in Afghanistan as his very own little war. It’s his baby, White House says. He dots... 

More Spoof Breaking News. From The Boys At Stirring Trouble

June 4, 2011

More Spoof Breaking News. From The Boys At Stirring Trouble

We present more spoof breaking news items. From the boys at Stirring Trouble. Breaking News: White House says President Obama is ready to promise anything to anyone. As part of his election campaign. Breaking News: Vice President Joe Biden says it’s spooky to be ‘just one heartbeat away from the presidency’. Sometimes I get crazy ideas, he admits. Mitt Romney reveals that he had consulted with all his five wives before announcing his intention to run for president next year. Breaking News: Hillary Clinton denies rumours that she’s been taking supplements to help her understand what foreign policy is all about. Breaking News: Asked whether she realises that she is a joke, Sarah Palin says that at least she is a good joke that makes people laugh. Breaking News: US State Department says... 

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