• Home
• About Alexander
• About Stirring Trouble
• Books
• Word From The Editor
• Living In America
• Pardon Me For Asking
• Contact

• Angry Rants
• Around The World
• Breaking news
• Business
• Consumer Watch
• Entertainment
• Let's Be Cynical
• Life In The UK
• Media
• Point Of View
• Sport

BBC Cuts Costs: It’s Taking The Piss, But Not As We Know It

Anton Goryunov writes: The BBC has done what it does best yesterday by taking the piss, at the expense of the long suffering licence payers. As part of its costs cutting exercise the Corporation announced plans to scrap two irrelevant digital radio stations and a couple of websites that no one has ever heard of. BBC Director-General, Mark Thompson, said with a perfectly straight face, that the publicly funded broadcaster was intending to concentrate on making ‘better programmes’. Mr Thompson also let be known that the BBC was planning to continue providing ‘unbiased news’ and make it even better. Imagine for a moment a meeting between the top brass at the BBC where the groundbreaking decision on cutting costs was taken. Director General: People, we’re in serious trouble. We have... 

Political Correctness Is Dangerous For Your Health, Study Shows

Doctor Stanley Unattractive writes: Research conducted recently on a million people across Europe has shown that political correctness, as a chosen sick and twisted way of thinking, can cause severe constipation and bloating, if practiced regularly. The survey, which was conducted by a group of medics headed by a brilliant scientist, yours truly, has found that extreme cases of PC can result in blockage of the intestines and serious pains in the colon when passing shit, or, as we medics call it, excrement. Tests conducted during the research have also shown that most people, who are overcome by political correctness, demonstrate extreme anger, when confronted with anything that even slightly resembles common sense. In some cases their anxiety can result in nervous breakdowns and heightened... 

How Come Superheroes Are So Useless? Not To Mention Dumb And Satanic Looking

Adam Lovejoy writes: It always puzzles why superheroes are so useless? The concept itself could have only originated in America, obviously, where a lot of people like the idea of someone attaining superpowers and using them for all sorts of stupid things, like snatching screaming broads out of the paths of speeding means of transport, or causing mayhem and then heroically sorting it out. This last bit, by the way, I personally find especially hilarious, because it always reminds me of the description of the Communist Party of China that has always been known for creating problems and then doing its best to overcome them. But I digress. Imagine, people acquire powers beyond any comprehension that could be used to help mankind resolve numerous global problems. Like directing rivers towards areas... 

Of Dreams And Dreamlands. And Of Europe Becoming Germania

Martin McCauley: In case you’ve been in space for the past couple of months I’d better tell you that Greece is heading for a financial meltdown. The budget deficit is about 12 per cent, which is a lot by any standards. If the Greek governments decides to cut the deficit to meet the EU required level of 3 per cent within a few years, the country would become ungovernable and might even slide into a civil war. The other countries of the EU that share the same currency with Greece, the once mighty euro, are obviously very worried. It is quite possible that Greece could drag others into the bottomless pit of financial instability, especially considering that Ireland, Portugal and Spain are already bankrupt and Britain and Italy are closing in on them. Germany that views itself as the... 

Village Idiot Look Is Going To Be Mega Huge This Year, Fashion Experts Say

Dan Majestic writes: The village idiot look is going to be mega huge this year. That was the verdict passed by leading fashion experts, who had gathered for their annual piss up on the eve of London Fashion Week to discuss what’s going to be hot on the catwalks and in the shops in the next couple of seasons. Strong demand for clothes that make people look like degenerates is predicted this spring and summer, dispelling the myth that the village idiot look, or VIL as some in the industry call it, is on its way out. ‘VIL is something that allows people to express themselves fully,’ Juicy Freddy, a self-confessed fashion guru and a drug addict told Stirring Trouble. ‘It has a feel of vibrancy and freedom about it, not to mention that any self-respecting bird or bloke would rather... 

The Catcher In The Rye: Classic Literature It Ain’t

I have a confession to make: I don’t like some of the books that are considered by many people to be eternal classics. I have tried to like them, I read them and re-read them, but they still do appeal to me. I’m sorry, but that’s how it is with me. I do not like the characters, the plot, the main idea and I don’t like what the author stands for generally. So why should I say that I like this book or that just because it is considered a classic? What would be the point? It so happened that with the death of J.D.Salinger a lot of praise has been showered on his book The Catcher In The Rye. ‘If I had to choose one book that I would have given my soul to have written it would be Catcher,’ one hack has written. I’m sorry to go agaunst the tide on this one,... 

A Warning To Some Women: You Aren’t That Beautiful To Laugh That Loud

Why is it that average looking women, bordering on unattractive, often laugh very loudly? Have you noticed how they would respond to any comment with a loud, near hysterical laugh, as they sit at a table in a bar, a restaurant or a coffee shop, with their friends or work colleagues? It has always amazed me, that strange method of females attracting attention to themselves. Why do they do it? What is the point of getting surprised stares from men, who lose all interest the moment they see who is actually producing the loud laughter? Because attractive women would never need to attract attention by laughing or talking in a loud voice. They just need to appear, and men would look at them anyway. I personally find loud, unprovoked laughter emanating from women very irritating. It actually turns... 

Of One Conflict In Cyberspace That Is Not What It Seems

Martin McCauley writes: Imagine a meeting taking place in the White House. President Barack Obama sits in the Oval Office across from the people who run Google. (It’s a bit like a scene from Godfather, only these are all good guys.) ‘I hear you’re having problems with the Chinese,’ the President says. ‘I’m told they’re hacking into the emails of human rights activists on your Chinese network.’ Gloomy silence follows. ‘Let me propose something,’ Mr Obama continues. ‘Why don’t you present Beijing with an ultimatum: stop interfering with our network or we’ll pull out of China.’ ‘Well’, Mr President, replies one the Google bosses, a youngish looking man, ‘that would cost us over $350 million and the opportunity to expand... 

Who Else Wants To Take On The Taliban? How About Asking China?

Martin McCauley writes: Here is a novel way for the United States to resolve the stalemate in Afghanistan: why not ask China to step in? Militarily speaking. Especially as Pakistan has already been dragged into the war by the Americans. So why not China now, as it is bound to take the pressure off the US troops so that they can spend more time winning hearts and minds of the local population and train more Afghan soldiers, who will then join the Taliban and keep the war going. How it can be done? Well, President Barack Obama can nip down to Beijing for a day or two (see the image to this article) and ask his hosts, politely, to join the mighty American army in Afghanistan. And in return the US can promise to buy even more Chinese made goods. And store them in their giant warehouses or ship... 

Give Kids Credit Cards, Say Mobsters. So They Can Buy As Much Junk Food As They Want

Dan Majestic writes: Poll conducted among gangsters in Europe has shown that they have a soft spot for kiddies. Five out of every seven criminals, polled both on the inside (that’s in jail) and on the outside, said they think that kids should have as much junk food as they want from the earliest age. As one mobster, Billy ‘Bonecrusher’ Jenkins, explained, kids need a lot of ‘f..king vitamins’ that come in junk food. ‘I’ve always eaten that shit when I was a kid and I feel great now,’ he said. ‘Look at my fists. They’ve become huge from eating burgers and chips, and I used ‘em a lot to get things done. Every kid should have a chance to have fists like me.’ Bobby ‘Shotgun’ McCrystal, currently on the run for pulling off a bank job,... 

Next Page »

Advertisements

 

 

 

Recommended Sites

BFBS Radio: Sitrep

Previous posts

• Pearls Of Wisdom. From The Stirring Trouble Team
• Samantha Cameron Talks Candidly About Her Hubby. And Sort Of Blows The Lid On Him.
• LibDems Pick A Porn Chick As Their Candidate. We Look At Other Options
• Israeli-Palestinian Peace Process? Now What Process Would That Be?
• The Cold War Is Back. But It Not As We Knew It
• More Breaking News. From The Stirring Trouble Team.
• Is There Any Point In Dieting? Nope, None At All
• Winning Hearts And Minds In Afghanistan. Even When They’re Detached From The Bodies
• President Ahmadinejad Reveals Iran’s Official Policy
• A Cynical Look At Life In Britain. And The Stiff Upper Lip
• As The British Press Sells Its Soul To The Devil, We Go Behind The Scenes Of One Newspaper
• From Now On The Met Office Will Express Doubt About Its Own Forecasts
• Pearls Of Wisdom. From The Stirring Trouble Team
• Live Coverage Of The Oscars Proves A Huge Hit. With Dozens Of People
• More Breaking News. From The Stirring Trouble Team
• Mossad Is Thinking Of Going Public. As A Plc
• Who Cares About Elvis Or Who Killed John Kennedy? Aliens Are Running Things Here
• TV Debates Between Party Leaders Will Include Product Placements
• Band Aid: Sir Bob And Friends Do Some Soul Searching
• More Breaking News. From The StirringTrouble Team
• President Zuma: The Man With The Plan
• The New Rich Have No Style, No Class, No Taste. No Anything
• Pearls Of Wisdom: From The Sirring Trouble Team
• About One Pine Tree. And Global Warming Written All Over It
• More Breaking News Items. From The Stirring Trouble Team
• BBC Cuts Costs: It’s Taking The Piss, But Not As We Know It
• A Case Of One Madman Blowing All The Money
• More Breaking News. From The Stirring Trouble Team
• Climate Change Myth Is Causing Panic. Even Among Climate Change Biggest Fans
• Political Correctness Is Dangerous For Your Health, Study Shows

Copyright © 2010 Alexander Nekrassov - Stirring Trouble Internationally – A humorous take on news and current affairs

Website Design

Buy Cheap Software Adobe InDesign CS