Pearls Of Wisdom. From The Boys At Stirring Trouble

August 12, 2011

Pearls Of Wisdom. From The Boys At Stirring Trouble

Today we present more pearls of wisdom and witty observations from the boys at Stirring Trouble. And all you aging pop stars with knighthoods who’ve been plugging drug use all their lives: you’ll rot in hell, you impotent punks! You know what makes the Right and the Left very similar? Both don’t give a damn about the little people. Not only were the rioters in London stupid. They had terrible taste judging the clothes they nicked. They keep showing scenes of violence on the box in Britain to demonise the rioters. But how about showing how families are evicted from their homes by banks all across the land. Yes, liberated chicks. By the time they’re 18, more dicks pass through their vaginas that trains through Clapham Junction. The most disturbing thing about the riots in Britain... 

Come Into My Parlour Said The Spider To The Fly: Of Spin In Politics

July 19, 2011

Come Into My Parlour Said The Spider To The Fly: Of Spin In Politics

Thomas Mathew writes from London: Given all the spin we have endured during Tony Blair’s and Gordon Brown’s premierships and faced with the current phone tapping scandal that basically represent a case of spin getting out of control, I suppose it’s a good time to actually establish what the term ‘spin’ stands for in politics. It comes from the saying ‘to spin a yarn’, to tell a fanciful story, to trick someone into believing something that does not exist, to lure someone into a trap. As in that nursery rhyme with the spider inviting the fly to drop down into his parlour. A fine example of spin, by the way, is Tony Blair’s memoirs, A Journey, that contains so much spinning in it that this website has produced a parody of it with great ease. (Read part 4 of it here... 

I Bet The Brits Are Jealous Of The Egyptians: A Bit Of Rioting And Their Nasty Leader Is Gone

February 11, 2011

I Bet The Brits Are Jealous Of The Egyptians: A Bit Of Rioting And Their Nasty Leader Is Gone

Ben Delicious writes from London: I bet a lot of people in Britain are jealous of the Egyptians. Imagine, it took them less than three weeks to get rid of their nasty dictator, President Hosni Mubarak, who was forced to step down today in the face of people’s power. This would never work in Britain. It’s a democracy, you see, and unlike Egypt it has a democratically elected government that stays on and on, even if it proves to be totally incompetent and corrupt. People in Britain can protest for as long as they want against their political rulers, demanding that they step down, but they would stay on, insisting that they have been elected democratically and would never dream of breaking their contract with the voters. And even when general elections finally arrive, the voters find that... 

Let’s Ask Some Cynical Questions About People’s Suffering

November 14, 2010

Let’s Ask Some Cynical Questions About People’s Suffering

Dan Majestic writes from London: I would like to ask all those people in Britain who write passionate letters to newspapers and send emails and texts to TV news channels, expressing shock and horror at the death of innocent children and civilians in conflicts or of cold and hunger around the world: how about victims of violence and neglect closer to home? How about four children a week dying of abuse and domestic violence in Britain? And how about around 25,000 British pensioners dying each winter because they cannot afford to switch the heating on? And what about the old people, who are going to die this winter? How about demanding justice for them? Now, I don’t see angry protesters in Britain putting pressure on the government to take drastic measures to protect small children, dying... 

Do Political Leaders Avoid Punishment For Their Sins? I Don’t Think So

August 9, 2009

Do Political Leaders Avoid Punishment For Their Sins? I Don’t Think So

People often ask me: how come most political leaders avoid punishment for the mess they create? And the names of former U.S. President, George Bush, and former British Premier, Tony Brown, always seem to come up in these conversations as examples of politicians, who have caused a lot of grief, both at home and abroad, and yet have not been held accountable for anything. Blair has managed to make a fortune for himself on the lecture circuit and Bush is having a a comfortable retirement, getting a library named after him and writing his memoires. And former Russian President, currently Prime Minister, Vladimir Putin, has not been brought to account for turning Russia back into a communist state and is even planning to return to the Kremlin very soon for another spell of running the country.... 

Brown And Obama Are Not Saving Their Economies. They Are Gambling With The Future.

July 28, 2009

Brown And Obama Are Not Saving Their Economies. They Are Gambling With The Future.

Thomas Mathew writes: Let me tell you something about this financial crisis and the recession it has ignited, both in the U.S. and Britain: I can already see the makings of the next economic upheaval. And you know why I see it? Because the money men, along with their supporters, have managed to sell the poisonous idea to the public that it supposedly makes sense to throw good money at the bad to get things sorted out. By ‘good’ I mean taxpayers’ money and by ‘bad’ I mean all the bad debts of the American and British banks. Bad debts have always stood in banking for incompetence, excessive risk taking, greed, corruption and deceit. The bankers who have presided over these debts should have been forced out, investigated for possible corruption and had their assets confiscated,... 

We Present More Breaking News Items. From The Stirring Trouble Team

July 15, 2009

We Present More Breaking News Items. From The Stirring Trouble Team

Today we present more breaking news items from our team that monitors the wires and all the TV news channels across the world. Breaking News: President Obama rejects any notion that he had given in to Putin’s pressure after he was served black caviar in Moscow during his recent visit. Breaking News: U.S. Treasury Secretary, Tim Geithner, overheard saying: ‘The boss sure has no idea what the hell he’s doing.’ Breaking News: Joe Biden is voted the most handsome Vice President in U.S. history. Correction to previous Breaking News: Joe Biden is voted the most handsome Vice President in U.S. history, after Spyro Agnew. Breaking News: President Obama says he carries photos of Karl Marx and Vladimir Lenin in his wallet. Breaking news: Former U.S. President George Bush says... 

Tolerance Is A Good Thing. But It Can Be Taken A Bit Too Far

July 4, 2009

Tolerance Is A Good Thing. But It Can Be Taken A Bit Too Far

There was a joke in Russia in Soviet times. It went like this: a meeting starts at a large enterprise, summoned by the chairman of the local Communist Party branch. The chairman announces: ‘We have decided, unanimously, at our last closed session of the local Party Committee to hang every third worker tomorrow, as we have to cut down our costs.’ A tense hush ensues. Then a hand goes up. A man asks: ‘Would we need to bring our own ropes or would the Party Committee provide the ropes for us?’ What this joke implied was that hideous things were happening in the Soviet Union and many people still accepted them as if they were normal things. And I remember how Westerners, including Brits, were asking me then how could it have happened that the Russian people allowed their political... 

When Politicians Should Just Say Nothing. And Do Their Job

June 28, 2009

When Politicians Should Just Say Nothing. And Do Their Job

Alex Nekrassov writes: There was no doubting of Michael Jackson’s global appeal and unrivalled ability to entertain at the peak of his career. And yet ,even in his prime, he was no Mozart and even no Elvis. I for one found his music karaoke-esque and the man himself odd and even weird at most times.Jackson was clearly a deeply disturbed man, especially over the last decade. His rapidly deteriorating health, due, as we are told now, to his addiction to surgery and prescription drugs, his strange life style, his child molestation charges and the loss of a multimillion fortune combined a spectacularly potent mix that brought down a man whom some people still call the King of Pop. As opposed to Elvis, who was just The King. Jackson was on the verge of launching his ‘great comeback’,... 

Angry Rants Of A Cynic: We’re Being Taken For A Ride. By Politicians And Money Men

June 21, 2009

Angry Rants Of A Cynic: We’re Being Taken For A Ride. By Politicians And Money Men

Former devout Marxist and current unelected British Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, must be taking the British people for total idiots. In his last interview this man, who has singlehandedly bankrupted the nation to save the failed banks from collapsing, said that he was ‘deeply hurt’ by all the recent personal criticism of him. Brown, a man of very modest abilities and no understanding of finance, had had the nerve to actually say that he could stand down from his post at any moment but he continues to carry on because he thinks that he has a job to finish. Yes, finish off Britain for good. He knows perfectly well that the banks will reward him for his treachery. But he also has two more jobs to conclude: drag Britain further into the European Union and finish off the House of Lords.... 

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