More Breaking News. From The Stirring Trouble Team
March 2, 2010
Today we present more spoof breaking news items. From the Stirring Trouble team. Breaking News: While kissing each other after scoring 4 goals against Chelsea recently, Manchester City players fondled each other. Breaking News: A charity single is recorded for the victims of the earthquake in Chile by a group of obscure artists. To plug their albums. Breaking News: Scientists discover that the theory of evolution was a practical joke that Darwin played. To impress birds with no brains. Breaking News: Scandal erupts as George Bush makes a slip of the tongue and admits he spied for the Russians during his presidency. Breaking News: New secret documents reveal that French President Nicolas Sarkozy married Carla Bruni for her political connections. Breaking News: Dutch government says it wants...
Stirring Trouble’s Football Awards Of 2009. Starting With Worst Transfer Of The Year Award
December 31, 2009
Alex Nekrassov writes: As the year 2010 knocks on our collective doors it’s a perfect time to give out various (and thoroughly deserved) gongs to the people associated with the nation’s favourite sport, football. As you might have figured out, we’re deviating slightly from categories such as ‘best team of the year’, or ‘best footballer ‘ – these will be awarded at the end of the season anyway, and frankly, who cares who gets what. We feel our awards capture the spirit of the game in a way that the mainstream ones never could. So without further ado, here are the winners of the Stirring Trouble Internationally Football Awards of 2009: Worst Transfer Of The Year Award The winner of this category wasn’t really ever in doubt. In fact, we considered...
The English Premiership Wonderland: Of Players Going Missing In January
December 30, 2009
Alex Nekrassov writes: The English Premiership is a strange place. Words are often said that are meaningless, but are still eagerly picked up by everyone and discussed with vigour and excitement, as if they really stand for something. Teams and managers are praised, even though with all that money thrown at them they could have performed much better.And it gets worse. This is the time of year which managers of top Premiership clubs dread. It all has to do with the bi-annual African Cup of Nations tournament, with Africa’s best footballers from all around the world deserting their clubs. 16 nations from the continent will take part in the month-long tournament, between January 10 and 31 in 2010 in Angola. Typically, in the English Premiership and out of the top four clubs, the team which...
On The English Premiership League: A View From Afar
October 24, 2009
Anton Goryunov writes from Moscow: Pardon me for asking, but does anyone in England treats the Premiership football league seriously anymore? Mind you, I’m not a big expert, I’m just an observer who gets an occasional glimpse of some Premiership match or looks through the sports pages of the British newspapers, picking up bits of information here and there. Still, there are things that I simply cannot understand about the Premiership. For example, how come of the 20 clubs in the league only four have any realistic chance of winning the league while the rest are there to battle it out for the chance to be relegated to the Coca Cola Championship? This is supposed to be the most exciting football league in the world and yet, there are only four clubs in it that are technically capable...
There’s No Need To Panic. Man U Are Still Gathering Pace
August 21, 2009
Alex Nekrassov writes: Write Manchester United off, at your peril. Sir Alex Ferguson’s men suffered a shock 1-0 defeated at the hands of newly promoted minnows, Burnley, and ever since the media machine has been doing what it does best – making a mountain out of a mole hill. Some football analysts are even going as far as writing Manchester United off in this Premiership season, and all after one game of football.There is no doubt that by losing Ronaldo to Real Madrid Manchester United have become weakened. He is currently the world’s best player and the departure of such a significant member of the first team would be a blow to any club in the world. The expectation for many Man U fans was that the money raised from the Portuguese star’s departure would all be reinvested...
The Curse Of The Blues: Why Money Can’t Buy Chelsea United Any Love
July 8, 2009
In life there are now three certainties: death, taxes and Chelsea football club changing their manager every summer. This year, Carlo Ancelotti takes the reins at the club after agreeing to part company with AC Milan, a team he has guided to domestic glory in the Italian league and cup, as well as the European Champions League. Guus Hiddink, who juggled the Chelsea manager’s job for half a season with his commitments as Russia’s national team coach, makes way for the Italian after Chelsea’s owner, Roman Abramovich, had to allegedly bow to pressure from Russian fans to keep the Dutchman solely in charge of running the affairs of Russia’s number one team. Cynics are saying, though, that Hiddink himself did not really want the permanent job at Chelsea, preferring the calmer...
The Thing About Chelsea FC Is That Roman Abramovich Is Throwing Too Much Money At It
February 8, 2009
As I watch the saga with Chelsea FC unravel – another manager, Luiz Filipe Scolari, sacked, with a huge pay out – I realise that Roman Abramovich still does not get it: money is not enough to build a strong team that can play creative, intelligent football and deliver not only at home but in Europe. Abramovich is a typical representative of Russian big business: evasive, uncommunicative, uninspiring, with little regard for other people and with a firm belief that he can achieve anything by outspending others.Richard Branson this man ain’t. The latest estimate puts Ambramovich’s overall investment into Chelsea at around £710 million. And that is not even including the pay out to Scolari which would be about £8 million and the players’ wage bill for this year that...
Arsenal Beat Chelsea 2:1. And The Blues Did Not Even Manage To Score Once
December 1, 2008
Alex Nekrassov junior writes: Arsenal’s title charge appears to be back on track after a brave display saw them come from a goal down to beat Chelsea 2-1 at Stamford Bridge. And Chelsea did not even manage to score once.Allow me to explain: Chelsea took the lead after a clumsy and unnecessarily rushed throw from Arsenal goalkeeper, Manuel Almunia, gave back possession to the home side. The marauding Chelsea right-back, Jose Bosingwa, accepted the gift and ran down the channel, firing a low and inviting cross which committed Arsenal’s young Swiss centre back, Johan Djourou, into making a sliding block. Unfortunately for Djourou, he inadvertently guided it past his own goalkeeper, giving Chelsea a first half lead. Explanation ends here. Chelsea suffocated much of Arsenal’s...
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