A Cynical Look At Life In Britain. And The Stiff Upper Lip
March 10, 2010
Adam Lovejoy writes: It can only happen in Britain: the government bankrupts the country to the tune of £2 trillion and no one pretty much says a word. Everyone is too busy, melting their plastic and struggling to pay off their growing debts, to notice such trifles as going bust on a national level. Very British this, very stiff upper lip. With collagen added. And how about being taken for a ride by the Labour government and its chums in Brussels with that Lisbon treaty? It just beggars belief that the British people, who have an instinctive revulsion for everything that is linked to the EU, sleepwalked into the trap and allowed Brown&Co to sell them down the river. Who on earth believes that the Lisbon treaty is in any way different from the previous constitution that had been rightly...
More Breaking News. From The Stirring Trouble Team
March 8, 2010
We present more breaking news. From the award winning Stirring Trouble Team. Breaking News: President Obama says: America will pull out of Iraq, but it will never leave. Breaking News: Iraqi government denies claims it used footage from the times of Saddam to prove that many people took part in the parliamentary elections. Breaking News: Iraqi authorities say their appeal to the people ‘Vote, you pricks, or else!’ was not over the top. Breaking News: White House says that suicide bombers in Iraq, who have tried to prevent people voting in the elections, are just weird. Breaking News: American occupation is voted the coolest thing that ever happened to Iraq. By members of the Iraqi cabinet and US troops. Breaking News: Prime Minister Gordon Brown talks to Tesco magazine about his mother....
Who Cares About Elvis Or Who Killed John Kennedy? Aliens Are Running Things Here
March 7, 2010
Robert Henry writes: Do I know anything about conspiracy theories? I most certainly don’t. I do know other things, though, like that a tomato is a fruit and not a vegetable, that two aeroplanes cannot knock down two skyscrapers and that politicians lie every time they open their mouths. As for aliens landing on Earth and posing as humans (Stephen Spielberg is a suspected case) or banks controlling the whole world and plotting against people, I can only speculate about such things, given the vast amounts of drivel flying about on the web. Although, come to think of it, I did meet a weird bloke in a pub recently, who called himself Thomas something. He told me that he was an alien, posing as an Irishman, who was sent here to oversee a plot by the Labour party to take over the country for the...
TV Debates Between Party Leaders Will Include Product Placements
March 7, 2010
Adam Lovejoy writes: Leaked documents, made available to Stirring Trouble, reveal that the forthcoming TV debates between the leaders of the three main political parties in Britain – Gordon Brown, David Cameron and Nick Clegg – would feature product placements and blatant advertising, to boost the election war chests of all the participants. The first of the TV debates would be broadcast by the BBC and involve hidden promotions, as the publicly funded broadcaster is not officially allowed to show ads, although, of course, it does, making the Corporation’ directors some one of the wealthiest people in the world. The three party leaders have been advised to wear garments, with clearly visible brand logos on them, that would picked out by TV cameras. A voiceover would say things like:...
More Breaking News. From The StirringTrouble Team
March 6, 2010
Today we present more breaking news items. From the award winning Stirring Trouble Team. Breaking News: Prime Minister Gordon Brown reveals at the Iraq inquiry that he was firmly opposed to war all along. While supporting the idea generally. Breaking News: Gordon Brown recalls the day when Tony Blair kissed him on the lips and said: ‘Darling, let’s do it. Let’s send our boys to die in Iraq.’ Breaking News: British press voted most unbiased and impartial. By members of the Chinese Communist Party. Breaking News: Turkey says it’s deeply upset by accusations that it committed genocide against Armenians. So we whacked a couple of million, Ankara says. So what’s the big deal? Breaking News: Members of Chilean government admit their standards of living have gone through the roof since...
A Case Of One Madman Blowing All The Money
March 2, 2010
Thomas Mathew writes: Well, the best known secret is suddenly out: Prime Minister Gordon Brown is a nutter, who screams at his own staff, shoves them out of his way and threatens them with violence. Fear has gripped the corridors of 10 Downing Street, where some officials wear body armour and walk down the corridors, covering their genitals with their hands. Mr Brown, as it was revealed, lives in cuckoo-land of his own greatness, where figures never add up, where black is constantly referred to as white and where lying is not considered a big deal. Oh yes, and where stating the bleeding obvious is presented as some great wisdom. You want examples? There are many. The PM in in denial about bankrupting Britain to bail out the bankers and is conmstantly banging on about some ‘recovery’...
More Breaking News. From The Stirring Trouble Team
February 27, 2010
Today we present more spoof breaking news items. From the Stirring Trouble team. Breaking News: Scandal erupts as White House is caught trying to sell the US presidency to a Russian oligarch for $10 billion. Breaking News: Documents reveal that Gordon Brown bankrupted Britain to feed his gambling addiction. Breaking News: Caught collectively masturbating, Dutch cabinet goes into hiding. Breaking News: NATO commanders reveal they always wear a condom when having anal sex with prostitutes. Breaking News: Argentinean President, Christina Fernandez, denies she is a sucker for a facelift. Breaking News: In a moment of madness and under the influence of drugs International Court in the Hague rules against itself. Breaking News: Serious erectile problems of some of the directors of the International...
Gordon Brown Will Face Tough Questions When He Appears Before The Chilcot Inquiry
February 26, 2010
R.F.Wilson writes: Stop the presses! Stirring Trouble has obtained a leaked copy of the transcript of the opening questions and answers during Prime Minister Gordon Brown’s forthcoming appearance, on March 5, before the Chilcot inquiry into the war in Iraq. This document reveals the questions and answers that will feature during the first session of the hearings. It appears that Mr Brown and members of the panel will have the transcripts in front of them, so that the hearings seem natural and off the cuff. Sir John Chilcot: Prime Minister, we are deeply honoured to have you here today as a witness. You could have chosen to avoid this hearing, but you took the bold step of coming here and submitting yourself to our relentless questioning. PMB: That’s the sort of man I am, Mr Chairman: truthful,...
More Breaking News. From The Stirring Trouble Team
February 24, 2010
Today we present more spoof breaking news items. From the Stirring Trouble team. Breaking News: NATO says if Argentine attacks Britain the alliance won’t lift a finger. Our policy is to treat Britain as a hostile country, NATO says. Breaking News: Argentinean President, Christina Fernandez, reveals she had another facelift yesterday. In protest of the British occupation of Wales. Breaking News: International Court in the Hague rules new US embassy building in London will constitute crime against humanity. Breaking News: Serious erectile problems of some of the participants postpone a meeting of the Organisation of African Nations in Lusaka. Breaking News: Greek bankers are spotted leaving the country with one way tickets. Breaking News: US Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke unveils...
Labour Chooses The American Way. With Jackie Wilson’s Song
February 21, 2010
Martin McCauley writes: Well, there you have it, we now know what Labour’s main tune would be during the election campaign: the song (Your Love Keeps Lifting Me) Higher And Higher, by Jackie Wilson.That was the track that was played yesterday, on Gordon Brown entering the hall in Coventry to deliver his message to Britain, the gist of which was: Trust me, I know things. Mr Brown was impressive and did a President Obama by reading from two teleprompters, discreetly positioned in front of him. The speech went very well and got loads of coverage, with everyone being very impressed by the song that was played when the PM walked into the room, smiling broadly. ‘Your lo-o-o-ve keeps lifting meee hi-i-igher…’ Few people, though, knew how much work went into this slick presentation....
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Previous posts
- Technorati
- LibDems Pick A Porn Chick As Their Candidate. We Look At Other Options
- Israeli-Palestinian Peace Process? Now What Process Would That Be?
- The Cold War Is Back. But It Not As We Knew It
- More Breaking News. From The Stirring Trouble Team.
- Is There Any Point In Dieting? Nope, None At All
- Winning Hearts And Minds In Afghanistan. Even When They’re Detached From The Bodies
- President Ahmadinejad Reveals Iran’s Official Policy
- A Cynical Look At Life In Britain. And The Stiff Upper Lip
- As The British Press Sells Its Soul To The Devil, We Go Behind The Scenes Of One Newspaper
- From Now On The Met Office Will Express Doubt About Its Own Forecasts
- Pearls Of Wisdom. From The Stirring Trouble Team
- Live Coverage Of The Oscars Proves A Huge Hit. With Dozens Of People
- More Breaking News. From The Stirring Trouble Team
- Mossad Is Thinking Of Going Public. As A Plc
- Who Cares About Elvis Or Who Killed John Kennedy? Aliens Are Running Things Here
- TV Debates Between Party Leaders Will Include Product Placements
- Band Aid: Sir Bob And Friends Do Some Soul Searching
- More Breaking News. From The StirringTrouble Team
- President Zuma: The Man With The Plan
- The New Rich Have No Style, No Class, No Taste. No Anything
- Pearls Of Wisdom: From The Sirring Trouble Team
- About One Pine Tree. And Global Warming Written All Over It
- More Breaking News Items. From The Stirring Trouble Team
- BBC Cuts Costs: It’s Taking The Piss, But Not As We Know It
- A Case Of One Madman Blowing All The Money
- More Breaking News. From The Stirring Trouble Team
- Climate Change Myth Is Causing Panic. Even Among Climate Change Biggest Fans
- Political Correctness Is Dangerous For Your Health, Study Shows
- Binge Drinking: Who Says It Ain’t Cool?
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