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Pearls Of Wisdom. From The Stirring Trouble Team

Today we present more pearls of wisdom. From the Stirring Trouble team. I bet somewhere in hell there’s a huge department that sees to it that Hollywood gets all the funding it needs. And the secret world government got, like, together and decided that banks deserve more bail-out money. If time wasting was a criminal offense playing computer games constantly would probably carry 25 to life. Fascinating how most American TV news presenters look like zombies. Insincere, glassy eyed, ready to read any rubbish they’re given. Paris Hilton arrested for possessing cocaine? Coke is so 1990s. Fruity flavoured crack is all the rage now. Parents, every time you punish your kids for misbehaving remember what idiots you were when you were little. It’s time for Sean Connery to pack it in.... 

Of Films That Suck: How On Earth Are They Ever Made? And Who Pays To Make Them?

Dan Majestic writes: I don’t know whether it happens to you but it sure happens to me a lot: I would stumble on a film, on cable – I don’t go to cinemas anymore – watch it for a while and then ask myself: how on earth does total crap like that gets made? And who the hell puts up the money to make this stuff? Apart from the mob, obviously, that doesn’t really care about the content, as long as it can launder some of the ‘juice’ through inflated production costs. That would probably cover about a third of all films that suck, I suppose. But what about the other two thirds of rubbish that is made? Someone writes a really crappy script and brings it to a big studio. The plot is non-existent, the characters are two-dimensional, the dialogues make no sense,... 

Live Coverage Of The Oscars Proves A Huge Hit. With Dozens Of People

R.F.Wilson writes: Live coverage of the Oscars has proven to be a huge hit with dozens of viewers across the world. A British man, who actually watched the Oscars live, was traced by investigative reporters acting on a hunch. He turned out to be 76-year old Walter Jenkins, a pensioner and a former child molester, who lives in Birmingham and boasts of having a pirate satellite dish that allows him to watch nearly 600 TV channels across the world, without paying a penny for it. Mr Jenkins, who spends most of his time at home, going out disguised as a huge black man to avoid harassment, told reporters that he stumbled on the live coverage of the Oscars by pure chance, while searching for a Dutch porn channel, which he sometimes records and then sells to his neighbours as Hot Vids. ‘I was clicking... 

The Weird World Of Cinema: How Come We Fall For That Rubbish?

Adam Lovejoy writes: How come people accept the most ridiculous things that happen on the big screen? The dialogues that make no sense, the vulgarity, the stupid situations, the two-dimensional characters, the primitive or non-existent story lines and the abysmal acting. That last one has always puzzled me. Bad acting, that is. How on earth do some of the film stars manage to get away with absolutely atrocious performances, time after time after time, and still command the adoration of their fans? Is there actually such a thing as a failed film actor? I mean, once actors get a part in a relatively successful film they seem to be destined for glory almost automatically, however badly they perform. If you ever bother to analyse the acting skills of some of the biggest film stars – impartially... 

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